“happy fathers day” its not about the words

Just three words, that was all. “Happy Fathers Day”, in a text message, that’s all I received this year for Fathers day. No phone call, card, or visit.

I have, for all intents and purposes, given up on any relationship what so ever with my eldest child. I am often told by others that they are trying to open the door, etc. I’m not seeing it.
They showed up to the wedding, that must mean something. Yeah, it means the family was going to be there and they had to put on a show and make it look good for the family.
I’m not kissing their ass, or bending over backwards. The ball is in their court. And I’m really just to busy to worry about it or care. It may sound cold, but that’s how I feel.

I will put forth some effort toward the youngest, they have not said and published the hateful, hurtful things that the eldest has. They have not blamed me or accused me of things that didn’t happen. I see a potential for a relationship with the youngest.

I see no hope for a future relationship with the eldest.

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My reality check!

I had a strong dose of reality last week, one of my parents has to undergo major surgery.

Now, I should explain, both of my parents are pretty darn healthy. No major issues, some minor surgeries in the past, appendix and the like. One is on about 3 meds, the other is on none. Which is a rare thing for people in there 70’s these days. They go to the doctors on a regular basis.

They are slowing down a little, but I think they could probably both still run circles around me.

So, it was a big shock to everyone to find out that my Father has to have open heart surgery! I was fine at the hospital when they told us. But it hit me pretty hard on the way home. Reality hit me hard.

I realize that heart surgery is an everyday procedure anymore. And it is constantly improving in technique and technology. But, this is really the first major hit in my family. I’m sure he will be fine and back to normal in a couple of months, but its still a hard dose of reality to swallow.

I think a person has three hard reality checks in life. (I’m there are more)

1. In your teens most people have what I call “superman syndrome”. You feel invisible, nothing can hurt you, nothing can stop you. Than about your freshman year of college, a friend, classmate, etc. dies. It hits hard, you realize that you are not invincible.

2. When something happens to your parents. Whether it be a diagnosis, an serious injury, illness, etc., and you realize that your parents are not going to live forever.

3. When your spouse becomes ill, injured, etc. And you realize that you may be alone.

I have not been through number 3 yet, but I can imagine that in each of these your own mortality becomes clear to you.

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Update

I need a job, maybe things wouldn’t be so chaotic!
Mother-in-law (soon to be) fell and broke some bones, she’s been staying with us since. More than likely a permanent thing. Which isn’t bad, its just taking me awhile to get use having someone always there. And cooking two to three meals a day, everyday. If we ever close on the new house, I think it will be better. More room.

My youngest had another run in with the law. They will have to spend sometime in juvenile detention. Hopefully it will straighten them out a little. Next offense will, most likely, be sixty days or more.
The oldest ungrateful child still isn’t speaking to me, but is attending the wedding. Probably to keep up appearances to the family. Very fake just like their mother!

Still in the middle of THE Greatest April Fool’s joke of all time! I will post more upon its completion!

Still looking for work, it seems to be picking up. Hopefully, I will land something soon!

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Trapped!

Stuck in a hotel, with nothing to do and can’t leave. Worse than any convention I’ve been to. Had to check out of the room and still can’t leave until 5. Ughhh!

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Well, that was interesting!

Just going through, minding my own. Accepting the way things are.

But, no, can’t have that. My youngest decides to go get themselves in a pickle with the law again. That teenage invincible mentality.

So I get the phone call from the ex, cause she can’t handle it. She’s “given up”. I only get the call when one of them is in trouble, and I have to ride in to take care of it, fix it, etc.

And to boot, I somehow get volunteered to take the oldest back to university. The quietest hour drive I’ve ever had with someone else in the car! Didn’t get a hello, or a thank you.

I just don’t know about the youth these days. Maybe its just my ungrateful kids.

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A Very Good Week!

After the last week of hell, this has been a very good week!

We’ve made a lot of progress on the plans for the ‘wedding reception’. We have the food taken care, the cake order is in, the table and chair rental is in, the invitations are addressed! Life is good!

I’m looking forward to the ‘reception’ and our evil little plan! So far it is coming together and we are both excited!

The rings came in this week! I haven’t worn a ring in like twelve years or something, so it will take me awhile to get use to! But that was cool and made it all so real!

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Received the notice that the bankruptcy has been discharged. Received the notice that the bank is beginning foreclosure proceedings. Received an email stating that I was not selected for the job I interviewed for. Surprisingly, it hasn’t been that bad of a week.

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